Those of you who regularly read the Word of the Week (WOW) are probably thinking, “Did she forget that she already gave us a new word on Monday?” Actually, no. It just occurs to me that so many of you enjoy the WOW blog post on Monday that perhaps I should start a new feature discussing a single word and its ramifications for our world. Lofty aspiration, hunh? Yeah, it scares me, too, but here goes nothin’!

I chose “absolute” for today, because it’s a word that is not used as frequently as it once was. Even with advanced technology and increased knowledge from research, there are few absolutes in our world. One hundred years ago, most people in the U.S. went to church on Sunday, cheating in school was virtually unheard of, and most people were virgins on their wedding night. (Yes, I went there.) Today none of that is something we can take for granted, along with a lot of other things that used to be absolute.

In some cases these former absolutes needed to go by the wayside. For instance, women didn’t vote 100 years ago. Most of us would generally agree that women should be able to vote. Also, one hundred years ago segregation was the norm in most parts of the country and now, thankfully, that is rare, if not non-existent. So, of course, these absolutes needed to be changed.

But, in too many cases, we have abandoned absolutes to the detriment of our general well-being. I think we can safely say that accepting divorce as okay has led to a lot of children, both young and old, now grappling with issues that my generation didn’t experience as often. I wonder if we aren’t too quick to say it’s okay. Should we work a little harder on premarital counseling, faith issues, marital counseling, and on addressing (beforehand) the issues that generally break up a marriage? Of course, when there is abuse or cheating involved, it is probably best for a couple to divorce. But, many times now the divorce happens without these things being factors. I’m not saying that I won’t treat a divorced person the same as I would a chronically-married person (like me). But I just wonder if there isn’t another path.

Many Americans have also abandoned regular church attendance. Honestly, those of us who do attend may be the culprits. Too many of us are judgmental (unlike the Guy we follow–Jesus!) and thus, are unwelcoming to people who are different from us and the brave who do visit our churches often don’t return. In addition sex scandals have plagued churches. And who needs that??? But, in fewer people going to church and with schools having to forego regular prayer each day, there are fewer and fewer places teaching good values and ethics to the next generation and this ultimately leads to more crime and selfish behavior. It’s a shame since many churches are doing phenomenal things to change the church scene in a positive way and can really help when church attendees have difficulties.

I am also disturbed by the tendency to have families first and then marry. I’m the first to say that this is probably me being judgmental, but there is something stabilizing about a child knowing that they were conceived into a family where formal marriage was such a commitment that it came first! Yes, a baby demonstrates that commitment for sure, but will that child one day wonder if his or her parents would be together if it wasn’t for their entrance into the world? I just think it makes things simpler, even now.

If you disagree with me on all of the above, that is definitely your right and that is an absolute that I hope will continue for at least another 100 years. One absolute still remains: we live in one of the greatest countries of the world. And we should continue to espouse the absolutes that have helped to make it so and continue to abolish those which do us collective harm.

Friday’s Post: In other words…

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