Posts Tagged ‘clippers’


Maizie’s Musings: Fur-cut…



At this time of year I pant a lot. The mom person says I’m the loudest panting dog she’s ever heard. Like she’s heard so many…I’m the only canine around my domicile, so how would she know? She doesn’t say this like it’s a good thing. But it is a good thing–it cools me off.

I think, just to make the mom person happy, the dad person gets out these things he calls clippers. (If I were the dad person, I would do everything I could to make the mom person happy, too–I have seen her when she’s not happy and it’s not pretty.) The clippers have a really long “tail,” at least that’s what I think it is. It has a weird end to it that bulges and then has two ends to it. These two ends fit rather snugly into these wall openings at my domicile.

When the tail end is in the wall openings, the clippers make a buzzing sound and they vibrate. I have been around buzzing insects outside and that is usually a bad thing. At the very least it’s annoying. Most of the buzzing insects have wings, like the winged invaders. But, the clippers do not, so I’m not sure what kind of animal they are.

They seem really heavy, too, because if the dad person drops them accidentally, they clunk pretty hard. That’s probably why they don’t have wings–come to think of it. If you are heavy, flying’s tricky. Maybe they’re those really fat winged invaders that I see on TV a lot in the cold weather month (You know…the one right after scary midgets show up at my domicile door begging for people treats to put in their kibble buckets).

After the clippers have their tail in the wall openings (Doesn’t that hurt them?), the dad person takes me outside and makes me lay down in the yard. I was really nervous about this the first time, but those clippers really like to eat my winter fur! And I’m pretty sure my winter fur is part of why I pant so loudly in the summertime.

All I know is that when the clippers are done eating my winter fur, I’m a lot more comfy and I don’t have to pant. I seem lighter, too. So, it’s actually a good thing for me. Now, I just lay down immediately and roll over on my back so the dad person can let the clippers eat my belly fur first. I’m instantly cooler with just that part eaten because that’s the part that touches that really hot green carpet stuff in my back yard.

The dad person noticed that I now like the clippers and so he decided to make me a little like them. I now have a fur bulge at the end of my tail, too. But I’m not letting him put my tail into those wall openings. I don’t want to buzz and eat fur. No sir! I prefer meat and cheese when it comes to eating. I’m a canine cuisine connoisseur.

Yep. That’s me. Maizie Flay. And you don’t see Bobby cooking with fur. He cooks with a lot of weird stuff, but not even he draws the line at fur.

Monday’s Post: What is pandiculation?

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