Posts Tagged ‘COVID’

24
Nov

Lessons Learned from a Pandemic…

I’m sure all of you could write this little post better than I, but here are my observations so far:

  1. I have really bad breath.
  2. Bad breath didn’t use to bother me that much.
  3. Thanks to wearing masks, I now understand why people don’t want to be close to me.
  4. Based on what I’m smelling, I need to brush my teeth…..all waking hours of the day.
  5. I have a really small face.
  6. Most masks are made for giants.
  7. My reading glasses are fighting a war for dominance with my masks because of # 5.
  8. The jury’s out on who will win # 7.
  9. All of the above fogs up my glasses.
  10. Pinching the nose piece on my mask does little to avoid # 9.
  11. I need a new closet in my new home for hand sanitizer, Lysol wipes, bleach-based cleaner, masks, and toothpaste.
  12. Make that 2 closets.
  13. Maybe one will do since the store is out of most of the items in # 11.
  14. I need another refrigerator for Pepsi Zero Sugar, distilled water, Skinny Cow Pretzel bars, Diet Coke, Diet Ginger Ale, and Snapple. In other words, if it’s an unhealthy drink, I need an 18-month supply of it.
  15. I won’t need the extra fridge because the store is also chronically out of the above items, as well.
  16. It may be time to stop the auto-refill orders on my sleep aids, heart pills, and arthritis pain control supplements. I have enough to last me until the apocalypse or another pandemic, whichever comes first.
  17. God and I may have to have a discussion about allowing a pandemic the same year as a U.S. election. Oh…wait. Maybe that’s His idea of an apocalypse.
  18. I spend more money at the grocery store when I know I have to stay in my home all the time.
  19. I spend more money when I order my groceries online.
  20. The UPS lady is now delivering dog biscuits to my doorstep.
  21. The dog biscuit recipient can sniff a hidden dog biscuit a mile away and will move large parcels with her nose with little regard for the contents of the parcel.
  22. After getting her dog biscuit, the recipient winds up in her crate because she broke the box contents.
  23. The recipient can now run 2.5 miles in 13 minutes flat in cold weather.
  24. The recipient runs the same 2.5 miles in 22 minutes in hot weather.
  25. The recipient’s owner walks the same 2.5 miles in 40 minutes, regardless of the weather.
  26. Clearly, we need to get the owner some dog biscuits, preferably Pepsi Zero sugar-flavored.
  27. I have now turned naps into an art form.
  28. I have just about completed all the sudoku and fill-it-in books at Dollar General.
  29. I cannot be trusted with phone versions of the games in # 28 because that’s all I want to do.
  30. That’s all I want to do because I have seen everything on HBO at least 10 times now.
  31. I’m beginning to think that perhaps I have been hypnotized and brainwashed by Keith Ranieri after watching The Vow and Seduced.
  32. Where is Survivor???? How more socially-distanced can you be in Fiji???
  33. I now want a facial mask for every occasion.
  34. I don’t know why I want # 33 since I go absolutely nowhere.
  35. I’m suddenly in hot demand for consultations and mentoring relationships. My diagnosis for all of them? Cabin fever.
  36. Cabin fever is very aptly named if you live in a cabin.
  37. A pandemic is expensive–We have upped our data plan; I have subscribed to who knows how many streaming plans; and a Zoom subscription is probably in my future if I can’t connect with some people soon.
  38. Spotify is next on the subscription list.
  39. I have completed 23 reading plans on the YouVersion app, including the “Bible in 90 Days” plan.
  40. I AM going to earn that Advent Reading Plan completion badge to make # 39 tally to 24 by the end of the year.
  41. I don’t think God is impressed by an Advent Reading Plan completion badge.
  42. I STILL haven’t finished editing my book.
  43. I blame the lack of Pepsi Zero Sugar in stores for the failure in # 42.
  44. Therefore, Walmart is keeping me from finishing the book.

20
Aug

COVID Craziness Corner…

In March I foolishly thought, “We’ll spend 15 days on lockdown and life will return to normal.” Have you seen, heard, or felt normal yet????

PLEASE let me know when you do. In the meantime, I’m going to do a little feature here on my blog called the COVID Craziness Corner. Feel free to chime in with your own version of absurdity about this pandemic.

As someone with an unusual heart condition, off-the-charts anaphylactic reactions, chronic migraines, osteopenia, diverticulosis, and aching joints, I decided that I just might be in the “vulnerable” category and should keep my bottom in one location. Call me crazy, but it seemed like a reasonable conclusion.

Staying home sounded relatively easy in March since EVERYONE was home including the ever-traveling hubby. But he’s back to work, as of this past summer, and this past month has finally gotten to me. I am…