Posts Tagged ‘cows’


The 12 Days of MIP 2014: 6 & 5…

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year! Sorry that this post is most decidedly late, but the hubby and I have been on a short vacay to an area with sketchy (at best) web signal and those around me needed the connection much more desperately than this ol’ blogger! Today we continue The 12 Days of MIP 2014 with the Number 6 and Number 5 of my favorite posts of the year:

Number 6 is all about living with my hubby and his unusual occupation. While he travels 15 states for his company on a regular basis, he spends most of his time discussing the south end of a northbound cow. Go here to understand what this meant for me.

Number 5 is also about things I’ve learned (or probably NOT learned) from a NEW endeavor in my life: Go here to find out just how rapidly my brain is deteriorating.

Friday’s Post: # 4 and # 3

You Might Also Like: The 12 Days of MIP 2014: 8 & 7; The 12 Days of MIP 2014: 10 & 9; and The 12 Days of MIP 2014: 12 & 11


The Odd Days of July…


Book Club Readers: Are you finished with # 6 of Songs in the Key of SolomonNo? That’s okay! It’s a very quick read. Get busy and start reading now!

Some months I don’t even need to comment on the holidays that somehow got onto the calendar. This would be one of those months. Read on to see what I mean, based on

July 1st – Canada Day – Does that mean that Canada has a U.S. Day, eh?

July 2nd – World UFO Day – Remind me to stay away from Area 51 today.

July 3rd – Compliment Your Mirror Day – I never knew my mirror had an inferiority complex.

July 4th – Sidewalk Egg Frying Day – Unless you live in Canada.

July 5th – Work-a-Holics Day – Otherwise known, at my house, as Father’s Day

July 6th – National Fried Chicken Day – Since 7/4’s odd holiday precedes this odd holiday, we have now effectively answered which came first.

July 7th – Chocolate Day – It goes well with your sidewalk egg and fried chicken?

July 8th – Video Games Day – If you have a teen, this is every day.

July 9th – National Sugar Cookie Day – Yay! I always want to decorate Santa cookies in July.

July 10th – Teddy Bear Picnic Day – I don’t usually invite bears to my picnics.

July 11th – World Population Day – Are we supposed to procreate this day????

July 12th – Different Colored Eyes Day – Probably instituted by some woman who was “seeing red” one day and was “green with jealousy” the next day.

July 13th – Embrace Your Geekness Day – So that means The Big Bang Theory is on, right?

July 14th – National Nude Day – I don’t recommend celebrating this holiday at work.

July 15th – Cow Appreciation Day – Not to be confused with Cow Tipping Appreciation Day.

July 16th – Fresh Spinach Day – Remind me to make a date with Popeye.

July 17th – Yellow Pig Day – When you find a yellow pig, let me know.

July 18th – National Caviar Day – Because one can never have enough overpriced fish eggs

July 19th – National Raspberry Cake Day – Only if Pillsbury makes a raspberry cake mix.

July 20th – Ugly Truck Day – That’s every day in Texas.

July 21st – National Junk Food Day – Perhaps this is redundant since we had fried chicken, chocolate, sugar cookies and raspberry cake already?

July 22nd – Ratcatcher’s Day – I will happily celebrate anyone who catches rats.

July 23rd – National Hot Dog Day – Also known as “Maizie after she catches 5 frisbees in a row”.

July 24th – Amelia Earhart Day – We should always celebrate people who get lost.

July 25th – Threading the Needle Day – Only if I can find my reading glasses.

July 26th – Aunt & Uncle Day – I expect presents.

July 27th – Take Your Pants For A Walk Day – Preferably with you in them. I suppose, after National Nude Day, we need this reminder.

July 28th – National Milk Chocolate Day – Not to be confused with July 7th.

July 29th – National Lasagna Day – I always crave a dish that you bake in an oven in July.

July 30th – National Cheesecake Day  – The Golden Girls must have started this holiday.

July 31st – Mutt’s Day – For those who missed out on National Hot Dog Day.

Friday’s Post: # 238….

You Might Also Like: The Odd Days of June; The Odd Days of May; The Odd Days of January; The Odd Days of December; and The Odd Days of November


The Effect of Other “Women”…

toy cow

Warning: Get a beverage first.

In case you hadn’t heard, June is Dairy Month. At my house, it’s Dairy Year…every year. Why? Because the hubby works for an agricultural company that sells to dairy farmers. Early on in my relationship with said husband, I figured out that I had some competition for his affections…the four-legged kind. I did emphatically state that I wanted me to be at the top of his affection list, but I have always known that, after me (and now our daughter), bovine female creatures are his next love…mooing and all. Here’s what I’ve endured after 31 years of such competition:

1. An over proliferation of cow-themed mugs. So much so that I’ve had to send the less significant ones to garage sales twice just to make room for more.

2. Cow-themed birthday, anniversary, and Mother’s Days cards. I tend to forgive this provided I haven’t already seen one 14 times and if they’re pretty humorous.

3. Giving out cow-themed thank you and Christmas cards, complete with the company logo.

4. Extra amounts of Febreze to counteract the bovine smell emanating from the hubby’s clothing. Lysol also works when it manages to infiltrate the washer and dryer.

5. When noting the above, hearing my hubby’s response of “Smells like money to me.”

6. A higher water bill because the hubby has to get the bovine smell off of his body as well.

7. A large collection of dairy boots in assorted sizes outside my garage door, usually with remnants of bovine manure still encrusted on them.

8. Cow-themed wall paper in my hubby’s office.

9. Cow-themed knick-knacks, glass milk bottles, and cow pictures throughout my home.

10. A garage full of supplies to be sold and given to existing and potential clients.

11. Entertaining a house-full of distributors and sales managers as they meticulously discuss cow “proofs.” Don’t ask–trust me–you don’t want to know.

12. Knowing exactly how cows get pregnant. Let’s just say that a “walk in the woods” has taken on a whole new meaning at our house.

13. A remarkable amount of black-and-white decor throughout the house.

14. Cow-themed t-shirts that so fill up my drawers that the local clothing charity has enough to keep 4 cities fully clothed for 2 years.

15. Dirty cars and broken windshields. When the hubby routinely traverses rocky, dusty, and muddy country roads, complaining about the aforementioned usually falls on deaf ears.

16. My car conversations being interrupted by a sudden head jerk by the hubby when he finds a new dairy he never knew existed before.

17. Understanding exactly what TPI is and why it’s important in the bovine industry.

18. Answering his cell phone non-stop because cows don’t understand normal working hours.

19. Living in small towns and out in the boonies because the hubby gets claustrophobic if there’s less than an acre between him and his next door neighbor.

20. Knowing that the s word is not considered swearing by most dairy farmers.

21. Losing a weekend date due to clipping cows for the 4-H Dairy Show that weekend.

22. Reminding my 4-H kids that using the s word is NOT okay inside our household no matter how many times they heard it at the Dairy Show last weekend.

23. Knowing why spray paint is important. Again, don’t ask.

24. Having 4 large coffee pots in my garage for the State Holstein Show breakfast.

25. Dressing my kids in Halloween costumes remarkably resembling cows.

26. Wearing cow-themed sweatshirts for the family Christmas picture.

27. Knowing exactly where that side of beef in the freezer originated.

28. Having to delicately explain what my hubby does for a living to “city folks.”

29. Despite explaining delicately, watching city folks respond with wide open mouths.

30. Realizing that dairy farmers don’t usually live next door to IHOP, Ikea, and Pier 1 Imports.

31. Empathetic smiling while my hubby explains why restaurants should serve butter as opposed to margarine to a very irritated waiter or waitress.

Despite all of the above, there have been multitudinous benefits to being married to “Dairy Boy,” so most of these things seem rather trivial after trips overseas and to Alaska, steaks every night for dinner, and a beautiful home, so I’ll keep on enduring the above for all the “perks” that come with it. Just don’t send me another cow mug.

Monday’s Post: What do you think eidetic means?

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