19
Aug
by maryann
The mom person wouldn’t let me on her laptop last week. She even took it with her while she was gone for a long time just to make sure I didn’t type anything on it.
I don’t know why. She’s just weird.
Because of her weirdness, I was forced to wait until now to tell you about my road trip in the thing with the round paws. We were in it for a really long time and the mom and dad person went with me. I had fun looking out the windows, but the mom and dad person wouldn’t open the top thing so I could put my head out and really survey everything.
Because of their lack of cooperation, I took a long nap out of sheer boredom. But a couple of times the mom and dad person gave me treats from a bag they got from people hanging out a window. Shhhh….don’t tell the animal doctor.
05
Feb
by maryann
Rrrrrrrrrrrrruff! How are my readers? Yes, you are my readers. The mom person just hasn’t figured out this obvious reality yet. She’s just weird.
Because I am Queen of the Canine Universe, I am entitled to paw massages. (The people tell me that entitlement is common in America, therefore, I am certain that canine queens deserve paw massages.) What is a paw massage?
When I sit down beside my people, I lift up my paw to them. My people know that when I do this, they are to rub all parts of my paw (top and bottom, inside and out), thoroughly. By thoroughly I mean for about 5 hours. Sometimes I re-position my corresponding leg to receive leg massages, too, but I’m fonder of paw massages. Other people shake my paw up and down and I have no earthly idea why.
15
Jan
by maryann
The people in my abode have given me a pretty comfy bed that is finally big enough for my entire dogginess. Before the new bed I had to curl up into a tiny ball and that is not exactly easy for my entire dogginess. While I love my bed, it’s not my favorite.
Shhhhhhhh….this is a secret, but when the people leave my abode, I hop up on the mom and dad persons’ bed. Now that is one comfy bed! It perfectly conforms to my entire dogginess and I can stretch out all I want. There is even room for all those canines I mentioned last week. However, if they got on my favorite bed, I would be getting off. Immediately.
The mom person says their bed is a Tempur-pedic. I prefer Tempur-perfect. The only difficulty with sleeping on my favorite bed is that I often take a nap there since it’s so comfy. If I fall asleep too well, then my sneaky human family can enter the abode before I jump off the Tempur-perfect. If this happens, I get in trouble, big-time and my canine bed gets put on a very drafty back porch.
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