E. D. Hill was a co-host of Fox and Friends from 1998 to 2006. While there, Ms. Hill found that there were few books on the market that helped her and her husband reinforce good values as she read to her children each night in a manner in which children could understand. Since she had access to a large number of notable people in her line of work, she began asking these people what values helped them to become successful and what principles guided them. The result? Going Places: How America’s Best & Brightest Got Started Down the Road of Life was published by Hill in 2005.

Hill gives a brief, personal introduction about each person she interviewed and then the person’s responses follow in essay style. Presidents, cabinet members, military leaders, congressmen and women, models, actors, and recording artists all donated their thoughts to Going Places and it makes for really entertaining reading, even if your philosophy is not the same as that of the person writing their thoughts. One entertaining part of the book is how each VIP tells of the people who inspired them!

Hill adds her thoughts about the values that formed her character at the conclusion of the book. While she wrote this to encourage and inspire her children, all Americans would benefit from reading Going Places, in my humble opinion. One starts to realize that there are recurring themes from a variety of people, such as, “Get your education,” “Work harder and longer than everyone else,” and “Don’t let setbacks deter you.” My favorite quotes from the book? Read below:

1. From Alphonso Jackson, Former Secretary of the Department of Housing and Urban Development: “A setback is simply a setup for a comeback,” That quote may have to go on the MIP Quotes page! This quote originally came from his parents who only completed the 5th grade and 11th grade of their own educations.

2. From Ted Nugent: “Acting decent is just as much fun as acting horrible.” Some of my adopteds would probably argue this, but as someone who grew up listening to this rocker’s music and rebelling some in college, I’m here to tell you Ted is right. I’m having a ball being trying to be a decent human being, even when I fail miserably at that.

3. From football player Rosey Grier: “Trouble is easy to get into and tough to get out of.” Oh, boy, is that ever true! Where was this message earlier in my life??? The translation? Stay out of trouble–it’s much easier that way.

Are there many, many more of these I could mention? Absolutely! So, if you haven’t read this little collection of wisdom, then get it today and give yourself a huge treat of encouragement.

Tomorrow’s Post: Lessons Learned from a Minister and His Family…

You might also like: Slow Reader Thursday: A Grace Disguised, Slow Reader Thursday: Tuesdays with Morrie, Slow Reader Reader: If Only I Knew, Slow Reader Thursday: Mink River

I have a rather large pile of books in my office waiting on me to read them for this blog post each week and I have to admit that I tend to just grab one from the pile when I’m finished with the previous book. For some odd reason (I prefer to think of it as divine.) I have managed to choose two books back-to-back that focus on loss and death. Last week I reviewed Tuesdays with Morrie which discussed the dying process of Morris Schwartz, a man with ALS. This week I turned to A Grace Disguised by Jerry Sittser. While Jerry Sittser did not go through the dying process himself, he probably wished he could after suffering the loss of three family members all on one night.

Jerry Sittser was forced to look after three small children on his own and to figure out what to make of the great loss he faced. While these losses attracted a great deal of attention, Sittser felt alone in his grief and the heavy responsibilities that befell him. However, rather than choosing to ignore or hide from his pain, he chose to dive head first into it and work towards making sense of it. He managed to succeed and to raise those three children successfully. He chose to ask God for help, even when he wasn’t sure He wanted to believe in a God who would take three people from him so haphazardly.

Sittser is quick to say that he blew it a great deal of the time, but his willingness to explore his thoughts, foibles and grief led to the writing of this book and led to him being able to help others who were facing their own versions of horror and grief.

He explains things far better than I ever could–here are a few examples:

1.”Catastrophic loss wreaks destruction like a massive flood. It is unrelenting, unforgiving, and uncontrollable, brutally erosive to body, mind, and spirit.”

2.”It is therefore not true that we become less through loss–unless we allow the loss to make us less, grinding our soul down until there is nothing left but an external self entirely under the control of circumstances. Loss can also make us more. In the darkness we can still find the light. In death we can also find life. It depends on the choices we make.”

3. “Many people form addictions after they experience loss. Loss disrupts and destroys the orderliness and familiarity of their world. They feel such desperation and disorientation in the face of this obliteration of order that they go berserk on binges. They saturate their senses with anything that will satisfy them in the moment because they cannot bear to think about the long-term consequences of loss….So they drink too much alcohol, go on a sexual rampage, eat constantly or spend their money carelessly. In so doing, they hold suffering at a distance.”

Loss and grief are inevitable parts of living on planet Earth. We can either choose to embrace it and delve into its horrible depths and learn from it or be destroyed by it. Sittser makes a convincing, compassionate and human case for doing the former. Every one of us should read this book and embrace, yes embrace, the journey of grief and loss, for reaching the “destination” is well worth the journey.

Point to Ponder Challenge: What losses are going on in your life right now? Are you running from them? Are you diving into their darkness and letting yourself grieve fully? If not, schedule some time today to think about these losses and allow yourself to fully feel the weight of its sadness, unfairness, and waste. What can you learn from this nastiness? Do you need help from someone you trust? Do you need professional assistance? If so, take one step out of the darkness right now and find that person. Make a date with that person to talk over how you’re feeling. You’re worth it!

I am probably the last person in the world not to have read Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom. Or should I say by Morris Schwartz? I would feel ashamed, but when this book was first published in 1997, I was busy potty-training a 3 year old and reading Dr. Seuss to him non-stop to keep him on that infamous seat. Wonder what Morrie would think about that process?

He’d probably approve since much of Tuesdays with Morrie discusses his reverse “potty-training” as he battled his body being ravaged by ALS (Lou Gehrig’s disease). Mitch Albom spent a great deal of his time with his professor during his time at Brandeis University, whom he affectionately called, “Coach.” Later, Albom encounters his professor again as Ted Koppel (Yes, that Ted Koppel) interviewed him. Albom decides to start visiting his old professor again when he finds himself on strike from his current publishing employer. They meet on Tuesdays and hence, the name of the book.

I can see why this book has touched so many. I cried openly and laughed out loud several times. But that’s okay. So did Morrie. We cried together. 🙂

I probably would have cried more often, if it weren’t for the fact that I was “forced” to learn many of these same lessons when I had my two heart attacks in 1999. Fortunately, Grace (the kind from the Man Upstairs) decided to intervene in my situation and allow me an additional 14 years this month. It’s interesting that I hit that anniversary this past Saturday and Monday and was reading Tuesdays with Morrie at the time, but that is just how my God works.

Some of Morrie’s quotations (that sum up my conclusions about life far more eloquently than I could write) are as follows:

1. “The truth is, part of me is every age. I’m a 3-year-old, I’m a 5-year old, I’m a 37-year-old, I’m a 50-year-old. I’ve been through all of them, and I know what it’s like. I delight in being a child when it’s appropriate to be a child. I delight in being a wise old man when it’s appropriate to be a wise old man. Think of all I can be! I am every age up to my own!”

2. “Devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning…You notice…there’s nothing in there about a salary.”

3. “…there are a few rules I know to be true about love and marriage: If you don’t respect the other person, you’re gonna have a lot of trouble. If you don’t know how to compromise, you’re gonna have a lot of trouble. If you can’t talk openly about what goes on between you, you’re gonna have a lot of trouble. And if you don’t have a common set of values in life, you’re gonna have a lot of trouble…And the biggest one of those values, Mitch?…Your belief in the importance of your marriage.”

While reading this old professor’s final words, I had fun imagining what my “textbooks” would be if I were to develop a course on living life to the fullest myself. I would probably drive my students crazy, because I would require them to purchase about 16 books. But, Tuesdays with Morrie would be part of the required reading. If you, like me, have not read it, do it now. There is no tomorrow. That’s an illusion, my friend.

Tomorrow’s Post: Think the MIP Eating & Fitness Plan are crazy? Yeah, me too.

You might also like: Slow Reader Thursday: If Only I Knew, Slow Reader Thursday: Mink River, Slow Reader Thursday: There Has to Be More Than This

The other harsh reality about being healthy and fit is that you most likely will not keep off the weight you’ve lost unless you exercise regularly. Regularly does not mean every 6 months, whether you need to or not. Sorry to burst your bubble on that one.

So, what is the story on exercise accoring to research findings and the experts? Regularly means you have to exercise most days of the week. That’s a bare minimum of 4 days a week for at least 30 minutes a day. However, that’s the MINIMUM for MAINTAINING your current weight. If you want to actually lose weight, you have to eat fewer calories than you currently are eating and you exercise a MINIMUM of 45 minutes per day at least FIVE days a week. If you are middle-aged or even age-proficient (my personally favorite way of saying that someone is no longer a spring chicken), guess what? It gets worse (just like everything about aging). Because our metabolisms tend to slow down with the aging process, we actually have to exercise a MINIMUM of 60 to 75 minutes per day at least FIVE days a week  to see some actual weight loss. Yes, this just stinks…big time. But, we really don’t get a choice on this one, so we just have to put on our big guy or girl panties and deal with it!

So, here’s how I do it with a really busy schedule:

1. Buy a good treadmill. Did you know that, if you get a doctor’s note stating that you need to exercise for your health, you can write off the treadmill sales tax on your income tax? Yep, it’s true.

2. Resist the urge to use your treadmill as an extra place to hang your laundry.

3. Put treadmill where you will have to trip over it….regularly. That doesn’t mean your junk room, your closet, your basement or your garage. I think the most effective place for it is right in front of your refrigerator door.

4. Get addicted to some series on TV or to a really good book.

5. Mount a cool TV near that really irritating treadmill.

6. Put on some really cool (You interpret cool the way you want to–I prefer both meanings.), really comfy exercise clothing.

7. Get a G2 (That’s gatorade for Hefty bag-sized people like me).

8. Get an old towel.

9. Take the G2, the old towel and possibly that great book to the treadmill.

10. Get on the treadmill. Yes, you actually have to get on it to begin losing weight. (Yes, I think it’s unfair, too.) Stop whining.

11. Start the treadmill. If it’s been a while since your last workout, you may need to actually read the instructions for this part. (I personally believe this is why many men still have their beer bellies.)

12. Increase the speed of the treadmill one “notch” at each commercial break or scene change. If reading, increase it at the end of each page, section or chapter. Try not to fall off the treadmill each time you do this.

13. Stay on that treadmill until you’re reaching for that towel or G2 like your life depended on it. For me this happens at the 50 minute mark. Why? Because I exercise for 99 minutes per day 5 to 7 days per week. Yes, you read that right. And yes, I worked up to this, starting with 30 minutes in the beginning. And I’m in my mid-fifties. Stop whining.

14. Slow that treadmill down about 90% of the way through your workout, gradually.

15. Get off the treadmill when snails can crawl faster than your walking speed.

16. Collapse on the floor and let the dog or cat lick the sweat off of you. Easier than getting in the shower–trust me. But, when you recover next week, you might want to wash off the dog slime in the shower. Then, clean the dog slime off the shower walls. That’s part of the workout.

17.  Repeat each day and vary the walking routine. (Most treadmills come with a variety of walking workouts.)

You better be reading this while on your treadmill. 😉 Yes, the treadmill has to be moving…and so do you. Stop whining.

Don’t miss on Friday: You 3.0: Tips and Tricks

Tomorrow’s Post: The last person to ever encounter Morrie…

You might also like: You 3.0: Mindset, Part I; You 3.0: Mindset, Part II; You 3.0: Mindset, Part III; You 3.0: MIP Eating Plan

Some friendships just last forever. I have one such friendship: one that has lasted over 40 years. Yes, I’m that old…and then some.

A few years ago this friend sent me a book entitled: If Only I Knew by Lance Wubbels. It is really more of a poem that spans 56 pages. And the premise is that if we knew we might never have a chance to see someone again or experience something again, we might take more time to appreciate that person or experience and be a bit more forgiving and kinder.

As I age, I find myself less judgmental and more forgiving, probably because I need less judgment and more forgiveness myself. But, Wubbels puts this into words far better than I:

1. “If only I knew I had the chance to pray with you one more time, I would take your hands and welcome God’s presence to surround us.”

2. “If only I knew that momentary pleasures could ruin a reputation for a lifetime, I would have found the strength to say no to temptation.”

3. “If only I knew that grief and heartache could be so deep and devastating, I would have been there more often for others.”

This is a quick read, unless you are like my friend, who found herself crying on every page! But, either way, we all probably need to read this book once in a while just to ensure we don’t take the special people and moments in our lives too for granted.

Tomorrow’s Post: You 3.0: MIP Eating Plan…

You might also like: Slow Reader Thursday: Mink River, Slow Reader Thursday: There Has to Be More Than This, Slow Reader Thursday: Live!

I seldom make predictions. Why? Because my “crystal ball” is usually embarrassingly wrong. But I’m going to make one today: Mink River will one day be a required reading for some college course or high school class.

If the great poet e. e. cummings had a novelist kinsman, his name would probably be Brian Doyle (author of Mink River). Brian lectured at the writer’s conference I attended in Portland in April. And what was so poignant about Doyle? That he cried. Yes, he cried. But, it is what he cried about that struck me.

Doyle was in New York City on 9/11. He lived there. In fact Doyle still carries the remnant of his New York accent with him. And he knew, intimately, people who were killed in the 9/11 terrorist attacks. The devastation of this event quite obviously still haunts him. And it is this sensitive spirit, along with his Irish lyrical poetic nature that compelled me to buy his book while at the conference.

Mink River is not written “normally.” It took me a while to “settle in” with Doyle’s unusual style. How is it different? First, he is an essayist and writes the entire book in essay style. Each essay is about a page or two in length and details a small story that when woven with the rest of the essays, forms one compelling, but interesting book.

He also chooses to write pretty exclusively in present tense and while doing so, he rarely uses commas and quotation marks. While reading Mink River, I concluded that Brian Doyle is “King of the Run-on Sentence” and yet, I could read his sentences easily. Since I’ve never been fond of quotation marks, I found it refreshing that one can read his book and know who is saying what without the use of quotation marks. So much so, that I may never use quotation marks in a future novel of mine ever again!

About the time one wonders if Doyle will ever create a story from all these essays, he does and he does it breath-stopping fashion. I found myself wanting to turn the page and not put the book down. And he writes poetically–even lists of items reminded me of great poetic style, like that of Robert Frost. And if the reader is bored with “normal characters,” Doyle uses time itself and a talking crow to convey parts of the story.

One word of caution when reading Mink River for my Christian readers: Doyle has a Catholic upbringing and like many Catholics, Doyle must feel that he will be forgiven just about any indiscretion by his parish priest. Thus, he infrequently uses swear words and lewd human frailty as part of Mink River. At first this bothered me until I realized that he only used it when dealing with “fallen characters” who were struggling to find their way in the Mink River world. In other words he was accurately reflecting the often non-Christian nature of every community in America today. Furthermore, truth and accuracy are at the heart of his writing and just when one thinks they’re reading yet another sleazy novel, he intersperses Mink River with Bible verses and the indomitable American spirit that one should conquer evil wherever and however it is found.

Tomorrow’s Post: You 3.0: Mindset, Part II…

You may also like: Slow Reader Thursday: There Has to Be More Than This, Slow Reader Thursday: Live!, Slow Reader Thursday: Jesus Poetry Slam

If you are truly going to call yourself a naturalized Texan woman, there is one experience you must undertake.  Nope, it’s not wearing cowboy boots (Most Texas women wear stylish flip flops 9 months of the year, my dear Yankee friends. Sorry to burst your bubble on that one.).  Nope, it’s not donning a rhinestone-studded cowboy hat.  Nope, it’s not getting “big hair.”  Nope, it’s not riding a horse or roping a calf or shooting a gun.

To be truly Texan (or in my case, the naturalized version) and a Texan woman, one must visit the vaunted, hallowed Sam Moon. For my Yankee friends, Sam Moon is basically Cheap Accessory Heaven for us lady folk down here in the Lone Star State. And it makes Claire‘s and Icing look silly.  Why?  Because Sam Moon’s stores are about 10 times the size of a typical Claire‘s or Icing store.  And there is much more there than hair dohickies (It most certainly is a word!) and jewelry at Sam Moon.  There are rows upon rows of tables of purses, tiaras, luggage and now, home goods. It’s boggling.

Until last year, I could not claim naturalized Texan status. Yep, that’s right. I had lived in Texas for 20 years and have never been to Sam Moon. But, I don’t think my first trip will be my last trip.  For the uninitiated, here is the “411” on what to expect when stepping foot in a Sam Moon:

1. Remind yourself to pick your jaw off the floor after entering.

2. Sam must be Asian. And I think everyone who works at Sam Moon‘s must be his friends and family.

3. They are serious about plastic coverings on things at Sam Moon.

4. I cannot explain our stupidity in not visiting this store when the DD had to wear an average of 4 evening gowns per year during high school.

5. If they have it in clear colors, they have it in red, pink, blue, purple, gold, cream, black and probably orange.

6. Not everything at Sam Moon is cheap. But that’s a good thing…for my wallet.

7. If you think you’re spending $ 50 at Sam Moon, you are dead wrong. Double that….at least.

8. The DD and I do not have the same taste in jewelry or purses. But, we are pretty good at spotting the things that the other does like.

9. I do recommend a “team approach” to tackling this store. See # 8. Next time, I’m bringing “backup.”

10. If you have a definite idea of what you want at Sam Moon, you’ll change that idea at least 5 times in the course of picking something out.

11. If you can walk out of Sam Moon without buying something, you are a man.

12. If you are a man and forced to accompany a woman to this store, bring War and Peace and one of those folding chairs.  Bring a drink for the cup holder. Maybe two. Snacks are probably a good idea, too.

13. There are no one-hour trips to Sam Moon.  Plan on at least two, if not three or four hours.

14. I am a sucker for a bargain.  I am a sucker for real leather purses for under $ 40, too. *sigh* (But, can I add that I’ve gotten a lot of compliments on my leather handbag that is really holding up well???)

15. Don’t see something that’s your particular taste??? Who are you? Ivana???

16. If it costs more than $ 5, then it’s in the “high security area.”  And you have to buy it in order to coordinate it with other things in other parts of Sam Moon.  Those clever Asians.

17. If you want to think about your high security item, you can put it in a box and take a number coordinating with that box, so it can be retrieved later when you decide you’re an idiot if you don’t buy it.

18. Apparently, a lot of people take advantage of those boxes.

19. Those boxes are not nearly big enough. I recommend refrigerator box size.

20. They keep building more Sam Moons. And they seem to get closer and closer to my home. This is not a good thing for my wallet. I would say that it might lead to a divorce, but the PH discovered the Sam Moon luggage store.  No War & Peace necessary.

Tomorrow’s Post: Remember Mattson?

You may also like: Lessons Learned from Committing a Neatness on My Laundry Room  and Lessons Learned from my Dentist.

Keith A. Turley‘s book, More than This, is yet another book I procured because I heard him speak at the writer’s conference I attended. For those of you who are tired of hearing me drone on about the writer’s conference, here’s the good news: You only have to suffer through one more book that I purchased from the conference and it’s a very interesting novel.

Again, I heard Keith speak in a workshop at the conference and was struck that his writing is devotional in nature and started by accident as he sent his friends emails about what he was reading each day. Often, I find myself doing the same thing, minus the emails. At first I thought Turley restricted himself to Biblical quotations  each day, but I was so wrong. Turley may happen upon a quote somewhere, anywhere and use that as his focus for the day.

Often I found my thoughts going in a different direction from his after reading the quote. But thankfully, Turley leaves space below his reflections for the reader to jot down their own notes. He knows me too well!

The devotionals towards the end of his book, beginning on page 105, were more thought-provoking for me, but perhaps that was because I read them all in one session when I was in a better frame of mind or could concentrate better??? Here are a few that struck me:

1. “When I read His word I need to act on them, not just walk away with a warm fuzzy feeling or good intentions…I need to realize that it may take time for my actions, or even my intentions, to bear fruit.”

2. “His desire for me is that I would allow the Holy Spirit to fill me, to lead me, to work with me and in spite of me….The hard part is determining which are my responsibilities and which are His. How much am I supposed to do? If I fail at work I thought God was leading me to do, does that mean it wasn’t meant to be done or does it mean I didn’t allow for His strength?…if I did [know,] I probably wouldn’t try some things that seem too daunting.”

3. “The fact…remains that often [others] are not out there screaming they are His instruments….Think about how you are His worker even at times when you think you are not doing anything to minister to others.”

Some of Turley‘s thoughts and cited quotes will definitely make the Quotes page soon!

Tomorrow’s Post: Moon over Texas?

You might also like: Live!, Jesus Poetry Slam, Laughter from Heaven, not a fan., The Hole in our Gospel, i am not but i know I AM, and 20 Books.

I encountered Christal N. M. Jenkins (the author of Live!) at my first writer’s conference in Portland, OR. If you’re depressed, she is the “medication” that doesn’t require a glass of water or swallowing a pill. Christal’s smile, alone, will raise your spirits. It’s a smile that has known a lot of pain and hardship and yet, refuses to give into “the darkness.”

She taught a learning-loaded seminar for new writers and I learned a lot from her well-organized presentation. Even more impressive is that she didn’t refer to her notes (At least that’s how it appeared to me.). But, as she alluded to surviving some serious health issues, I felt myself identifying with her story more and more.

Thus, I purchased her 2nd book, Live! In Live! she recounts losing a job that gave her a fair amount of status and deciding that she would succumb to the call to preach. Even though she felt she was doing just that, she began having scary health difficulties. This was made even more difficult by her hectic schedule of traveling and speaking and volunteering. One is often at the mercy of others for transportation and not knowing where hospitals are while traveling.

Eventually, Christal was hospitalized and a diagnosis was found. And yes, I have suffered Christal’s illness. But, that is not the point of her story (or mine). The point is that we, as Christians, are to speak life to others and live. How does one speak “life”? Have you heard of the Bible? 🙂 I confess that I often don’t enjoy memorizing Scripture, but when I do force myself to do so, it usually comes in very handy when talking with others who need some encouragement.

Christal felt she was being directed to Ezekiel’s description of the “dry bones” during this period of her life. And on pages 49-54 she deftly lays out what the “dry bones” of our lives could look like: unemployment, fear, tragedy, etc. As she does so, she reminds us that God’s word can handle where we are in our lives and give new life to those “dry bones,” whatever they may be.

Point to Ponder Challenge: What are your “dry bones”? How can you speak “life” back into them and get moving again? Does someone else need you to speak “life” to them? What can you do today to help that process along for them?

I have sometimes been compared with Erma Bombeck. No joke. I am so humbled by that mere thought. Another woman also understood what it was like to be compared to Erma. Her name was Barbara Johnson. I’ve had Ms. Johnson’s book, Laughter from Heaven, for ages and have just failed to read it. When I say I am a Slow Reader, I mean it.

If anyone had a reason not to laugh, it was Barbara Johnson. She lost her two sons, five years apart from each other. After she was diagnosed with brain cancer, her husband also was diagnosed and died shortly thereafter. In between she broke both of her arms and lost a tooth. She was also estranged from one of her remaining two sons. She was diabetic, too. But despite all of this adversity, Barbara chose to laugh and share the funny things she found with others.

Laughter from Heaven details these humorous findings. So much so that Facebook is now replete with them. And yet there is poignancy in her descriptions of her life during this phase. She humorously described how her wig would get stuck on the staples on her head from cancer surgery in one account. As I read this story, I could not help but think, “No one ever tells you that, when you get brain cancer, one of your biggest hassles will be getting your wig stuck to your bald head!” But, Barbara Johnson did and that frankness has made it easier for the rest of us to be real about our Christian lives.

I have had to do similar things, thanks to my lovely health adventures. Tomorrow I will be detailing yet one more visit to the doctor for routine check-ups. And I hope it makes you chuckle or smile. Because this is the stuff we just can’t get around some times. And so laughter and smiling and joy are the only ways to combat such sobering stuff. Indeed, they are the best weapons against letting the “monsters” win.

Sadly, Barbara lost her battle with cancer in 2007. And Erma Bombeck has also passed.

Guess that means just one thing. I need to do them proud.

Tomorrow’s Post: Caught with my pants down yet again…